2 lbs lost

Phew! I've managed to lose the 2lbs I put on last week. I kept forgetting to post it here after I'd weighed myself on Monday.
All that said, I know I'm heavier now, as I've not been sticking to my diet for the past couple of days and, to be realistic, probably won't over the next couple of days either, as I'm baking Jamie's big birthday cake tomorrow for his party on Saturday...
I am really struggling not to want to really overeat. I think I'm still struggling with the carbs, they really set me up to want to eat. But I was struggling on LL (low carb), too... I know I have big food issues and most definitely want to eat when I'm tired, which is pretty much all the time at the moment, due to a big comeback of ME symptoms recently... Oh well, I don't feel like wallowing in it here at the moment so we shall just have to see what I weigh next Monday...

No leeway with the DC way

I've put on 2 lbs and I'm not happy about it! It's entirely my own fault, of course. I've been eating outside my food plan (cheating!), so this is a lesson that I can't afford to eat outside my food plan (cheat!) while I'm using Diet Chef. LL obviously gave a bit of leeway but DC doesn't. No leeway with the DC way!
I know that carbs are the culprit. Not only do they hold onto water but they make me more hungry in the long run. Having a wee treat like scones, jam and cream yesterday instead of lunch doesn't work for me, even though the calories may be more or less comparable, because of the physiological effect of high GI carbs. They make me hungry and/or exacerbate cravings. I (chose to) binge/d last night as a result.
So... the answer is no cheating carbs from now on. Here's hoping I can stick to it. Unfortunately most of the breakfasts and the snacks are high carb - Granola, flavoured porridge with sugar, Nairns oat biscuits or cheese crunchies, fruit bars. So next month I'm going to order only plain porridge and fruit bars. The others are just too tempting for this poor weak-willed, sweet-toothed person (the fruit bars aren't sugary sweet enough to be much of a temptation).
I am scunnered about gaining weight but also philisophical and aware that this whole process is a learning experience and preparing me for the big wide world of "normal" eating. But there is just no way I'm going to allow myself to gain weight in the long term so - watch this space!

First non-LL weight loss

I've lost 3 lbs in the last week! Woo hoo!! The week consisted of 5 days of normal food (I think - I can't remember when I ran out of LL food packs!) and 2 of Diet Chef. This is incredibly encouraging for me as it means that I was able to control my intake of real food for those 5 days (including a couple of "treats"). In fact, when I told my slim daughter what I was eating, she was amazed. "That's not much!" she said. I was having eggs for breakfast, soup for lunch, some high protein - fish or chicken - and salad / veg for dinner and a light Horlicks or hot chocolate for dinner. That doesn't seem "not much" to me, but then I'm used to be on starvation rations (literally), and is a fraction of what I used to eat! In fact, I'm a bit concerned that Diet Chef is proving a bit too much for me to eat... This is the 3rd evening when I've felt pretty full after the dinner... Next weigh-in will tell all!

I was going to moan...

...about DC's Beef in Black Velvet Porter (how I'd love a pint of that!) having only half a dozen pieces of beef in it and padded out with potatoes BUT it tasted sooo good - really delicious, not too rich but so full of flavour - and I am so FULL after it, that I really cannot complain after all.

This has been my food intake today (very slim daughter Laurie said, when she saw what I had to eat in a day, that she wouldn't be able to last on it, but I'm used to eating little and being pretty hungry!):

Very small portion of Lizi's Belgium Chocolate Granola and milk.
One apple.
Diet Chef's Roast Pepper and Goat's Cheese soup (yummy but a bit black peppery).
One (large) orange.
One Naked Wildly Different Choco Loco fruit/oat/nuts bar (very tasty and surprisingly filling. I was concerned that the bar wouldn't be filling enough to keep for supper, so decided to eat it with a cuppa in the late afternoon and leave dinner til 8 pm ish. But I was wrong!)
Diet Chef's Beef in Black Velvet Porter.

And I'm FULL!!! I gave it a couple of hours after the fruit bar before I ate dinner, but think I'll need to leave longer, next time. In fact, I've just had a very bright idea. If the bars are filling and the Granola isn't, perhaps I should have the bars for breakfast and keep the Granola for a light supper. Of course, not all my snacks are bars, so some days I'll need to have Granola or porridge for breakie, but on all the other days, this looks like a good solution. I miss cereal in the evenings, when I used to sometimes have it for a snack, so this could work...

Diet Chef goodies

My Diet Chef goodies arrived this morning. 3 small but heavy boxes full! I thought, for fun(? well - someone might be interested!), I'd list what I've ordered and got to look forward to for the coming 5 weeks. There are 35 main meals, 35 soups, 35 breakfasts and 35 snacks. I won't list the numbers, just the varieties.

Main Meals
Beef in Black Porter
Beef Meatballs
Bolognese with Italian Herbs
Chicken Casserole
Chicken Chasseur (which is actually missing and I hope will arrive next week)
Chicken Curry
Chicken Fricasse
Chickpea Tagine
Chilli con Carne
Coq au Vin
Lamb Hotpot
Mushroom Stroganoff
Mutton Stew
Pasta Bolognese
Pork Meatballs
Pork Sausage Casserole
Thai Chicken Curry
Three Bean Chilli

Lunches
(shakes are an option here but as they are simply milk shakes and not high protein like LL, I decided against them)
Chicken and Thyme Soup
Chunky Vegetable Soup
Goat Cheese & Red Pepper Soup
Minestrone Soup
Mushroom Soup
Parsnip & Honey Soup
Pea & Ham Soup
Spicy Beef & Tomato Soup
Tomato with Pesto Soup

Here is a selection of them in my cupboards. There are so many, I've got two boxes full stashed away. All the soups and main meals have come in sachets, which can be heated in the microwave or in a pot on the stove.

Breakfasts
Original Granola
Chocolate Granola
Pink Apple and Cinnamon Granola
Treacle and Pecan Granola
Original Porridge
Cocoa Nib Porridge
Strawberry Porridge
Vanilla and Banana Porridge

Snacks
Cheese Oat Bakes
Berry Low GI Biscuits
Fruit Low GI Biscuits
Ginger Low GI Biscuits
Apple Bar
Banana Bar
Berry Bar
Cocoa Bar

Here's a photo of them, they look a bit more exciting than the main meals and soups!

I bet you're thinking what I'm thinking - that I could buy these myself and save some money. Yes, I agree (obviously, if it's what I'm thinking!) BUT I can't buy more than 35 of any of the 4 categories (main meals, lunches, breakfasts and snacks) and I would still have to pay for the full whack anyway. The availability of these products in my local Co-op is also doubtful(!) and another consideration is that this is all portion controlled and I'm afraid that's still important for me.

For example, I just had the Chocolate Granola for breakfast and, while delicious(!), it's a tiny amount and has left me still hungry. I've had an apple to tide me over but apples also tend to make me feel hungry, which I believe is a sign is an insulin resistance thing, which is why low-carbing suits me so well. There's no protein in this type of breakfast (apart from the litte in the milk) so I'm a bit doubtful of it working for me... The porridge should be a bit more filling, I hope (though I'm not at all sure about the flavoured ones - a new experience for me!). I might try some of the milk shakes next month and see if they're a bit more filling (though I doubt it somehow)...

My Low GI Rice didn't arrive with this order - obviously an oversight and now they'll take til next Thursday to arrive, at the earliest.

I got up so late today that, even though I've just had my breakfast, I can now have my lunch, so I'm off to choose from one of the yummy sounding soups!

Mix-ups of various kinds

First of all, I got mixed up with the amount of weight I've actually lost. My last weigh-in at LL said I'd lost 92 lbs, not the 88 lbs that I've mentioned in other posts (which I'll now edit) and listed on the counter. Since then I've lost another 3 lbs, using the "add 3 lbs to my morning weigh-in" formula!

Here are the full facts and figures, from Monday this week, which will be my weigh-in day:

Starting weight: 313 lbs / 22 stone 5 lbs
Current weight: 218 lbs / 15 stone 8 lbs
Weight loss: 95 lbs / 6 stone 11 lbs
Target weight loss: 152 lbs / 10 stone 12 lbs
Target weight: 161 lbs / 11 stone 7 lbs

The other mix-up this week is that my Diet Chef meals haven't arrived yet. Grrr. I had hoped they'd be here on Thursday but the courier's online tracking, once they were picked up on Wednesday, gave Friday as the expected delivery date. No sign of them by 5 pm today. I managed to chase them up to the local courier and he's said he'll be delivering my parcel in the morning, around 11 am. Phew!

I'm really looking forward to seeing what the DC food is like. I'm also really looking forward to the little snack biscuits that I've ordered! This week I've had to eat real food and have managed to restrict it to eggs for breakfast - hard-boiled or scrambled or fried with mushrooms (with no fat, of course!) - soup for lunch, salmon steaks and salad (or frozen peas tonight as the local shop had no salad) for dinner, and a "lite" version of hot chocolate or Horlicks for supper. Getting a bit sick of salmon steak, it has to be said!! No grains. Oh, except of course when I cheated the other night and ate some shortbread and Cadbury's Chocolate Fingers...! =:-o I will probably never be able to resist the urge to "cheat" now, but at least the weight is still coming off and I seem to be able to afford to do that now and again, just not every day. I've also had some fruit, which is recommended to supplement DC - strawberries for the last 2 days and a lovely crunchy juicy apple this evening. Yum! To say it filled the corners is an understatement, I'm actually far too full...!

I've yet to weigh myself following this week of real food, so it'll be interesting to see how that goes, if I've managed to keep my weight stable. I might weigh myself tomorrow morning in preparation for starting on the DC foods. I really hope the delivery man comes in the morning, I'm soooo looking forward to new food!

Cool!

I've added "Reactions" to my blog posts so you can give your opinions! This one is definitely "Cool!"

BIG changes

More things have changed. The Big News is that, due to my current financial situation, I've had to make the decision to stop doing Lighter Life. I simply do not have the cash in the bank to pay for it... I'm disappointed, as I kind of wanted to be an advocate for it - and to maybe feature in future tv commercials! ;-) Seriously, I would like to train as an LL Counsellor and I had hoped to go all the way with it, so I could sincerely speak from the heart about its efficacy. However, I do still feel it's done a lot for me - brought my weight down by 92 lbs (6 stone 8 lbs) - and helped me on the way to being slim again. I'm going to miss quite a lot of things about it, actually, believe it or not!

• The drives through to the Black Isle every week, listening to cds at full blast!
• LL Banoffee Pie (peanut bar, "toffee" bar - the inverted commas are there for a reason! - banana shake and vanilla shake) - they've kept me going these past few months.
• The thai chilli soup and the chicken soup made into "poppadums".
• The fruit drink powder to add to water and make it so much more palatable to drink (though I suspect it's the aspartame in it that makes it addictive...)
• Having the opportunity to stop off at Tesco while through there, especially when I was finally able to get into their cheap clothes!

Ah well, farewell Lighter Life. It worked brilliantly for me and I'd recommend it to anyone (thanks again, Lindsey, for recommending it to me!). If my finances improve (which isn't looking likely at all!) I may go back to it one day, if need be...

And the other Big News is that I've just placed an order for Diet Chef meals!! My sister (who is also using Diet Chef) is still helping me out with the costs of losing weight so I've been able to order 5 weeks in advance - actually 4 weeks + 1 week free, which has cost me only £30 a week!!! A huge difference to the £49.50 + petrol + food for 7 meals that LL has cost me this past week. This has been a lifesaver for me - thank you, Big Sis!

So... my new food packs - this time real food - are due to arrive on Thursday. Until then I have to try to eat as sensibly as possible. I have one LL food pack left, which is for tomorrow's lunch. I've yet to check with Donna if she has any more food packs I can get from her (to be replaced as soon as I can along with the others she "lent" me last week) to see me through to Thursday. If not, it's down to me to make sensible real food choices for the next 3 days. Eeeek!!

I'm a wee bitty concerned that I won't find the DC meals as filling as the LL ones, as the latter is designed to be low carb and, once in ketosis, the appetite is supressed. However, the DC meals are all low GI which, to my mind, is the next best thing. I will just have to keep an eye on my carb intake. And besides, I was still always hungry with LL food packs anyway, so I'm well used to that...

I've ordered (I think) at least one of each of their products (one wasn't available) to give them all a try. The ones my sister doesn't recommend(!), I've ordered only 1 of, just to see if it might be to my taste when it's not to hers. Namely, Parsnip and Honey soup - bit too sweet, by the sounds of it, but I have a very sweet tooth, so you just never know.

Yesterday I was at a BBQ to celebrate Donna and Duncan's 1st wedding anniversary, which started well with me eating my one protein meal + salad. It fairly quickly deteriorated, however, when someone turned up with a large tub of ice cream, cones and strawberry syrup. After partaking of that, I picked all day... *sigh* This kind of eating doesn't bode well for the long term but I'm still happy to say I've lost so much weight. Here's hoping I can keep it off in the long run. I've stuck to my plan today with my remaining LL food packs and my protein (stir fried turkey breast with chilli sauce and steamed spinach - yum!) and salad meal tonight. Breakfast tomorrow will be my protein meal (eggs) as I have only an LL mushroom soup left and I'm sorry but I can't face that first thing in the morning!!

Come Friday, it'll be ALL CHANGE!

One thing I've noticed that this past week of LL Route to Management has done for me is to really appreciate the taste of real (and healthy, fresh) food. It's been a real pleasure to eat each of my RtM protein meals and I've even noticed the stirrings of the desire to cook again. That's been a long time in resurrecting, I can tell you. Years of family cooking every single day of the week really spoiled the pleasure of cooking for me many, many moons ago. One of my favourite cartoons (which happens to be a feminist one) is of a contestant sitting in the Mistressmind chair being asked, "And what will the kids have for tea tonight?" The answer is - "PASS!"

PS Another aspect of giving up on LL that is unfortunate is the weekly weigh in. I will have to just do this myself once a week and will report it here. As there was always a discrepancy between my naked-first-thing-in-the-morning weigh in at home and the LL counsellor's fully-clothed-mid-afternoon weigh in, I'll continue to take that few pounds into account and try to be as accurate as I can about how much has actually been lost (as opposed to what I actually weigh):

According to LL, my initial weight was 22 stone 5 lbs. If I'd had scales at the time, I reckon I would have weighed 22 stone. So I'm going to err on the side of caution and say that the difference is likely to be 3lbs (and that I was probably heavier than I thought at the beginning). Unfortunately, I've got no comparisons of weight over the past 6 months to go by (I don't think...). So, every time I weigh myself, I'll add 3 lbs onto it, to keep in line with what I think I've lost... I hope that makes sense to me in the morning!